Father Francis Mary Stone’s leave of absence
My wife brought this to my attention. Here’s a statement from Fr. Francis Mary Stone, MFVA, host of EWTN’s Life on the Rock program:
Regretfully, I have a message that does not come without significant pain to both you and me. I have to tell you in all honesty and truth, that I have been personally involved with helping a widow and her struggling family. Over the course of time, the mother and I have grown very close. As a result, I am compelled to take some time off to prayerfully and honestly discern my future.
Naturally he is in need of our prayers, and we certainly hope he makes the right choice. He’s disappeared from EWTN’s website, and I doubt we’ll hear from him again, but we can hope. He’s a good host for the Life on the Rock program.
What is really interesting here, though, is the comments from some bloggers and many blog comments about how Father should follow his heart and discern his vocation. Perhaps it’s just me, but he already discerned his vocation and he already took vows of marriage to the Bride of Christ.
Here’s an example. Suppose I put a blog post up here telling you folks that I had become involved with a young widow and her family, helping them out, and had grown quite fond of her, and I was in the process of discerning my vocation. Would you put comments on here telling me that it was good that I was coming to terms with it and I should follow my heart? Or would you castigate me, seeing as I already have vowed fidelity to my wife and have two daughters? I rest my case.
Same deal with Father – he made his vows of fidelity, and for him to be “rethinking” those vows would be like me “rethinking” my vows to my wife. Neither is acceptable.
Oh, and then there are the folks who are using this as some sort of a way to argue for married priests. If only priests could be married, then Fr. Francis could continue his ministry while “following his heart.” Never mind that he’s already married.
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36 Comments »
November 14th, 2007 at 12:46 am
“As a result, I am compelled to take some time off to prayerfully and honestly discern my future.”
I don’t know where everyone is jumping the gun saying he is on a leave of absence from the priesthood. From what I can recall reading he is taking time off from EWTN. “prayerfully and honestly discern my future”
I don’t see anything in that stating he is considering leaving the priesthood. He never said he was reconsidering his vocation to the priesthood…it is possible that he is locking himself up in the desert in Arizona with a couple other brothers serving some cloistered sisters and deciding if his vocation is going to include public ministry.
The point is that no one who has made these comments knows the truth. This is something I have been meaning to blog about for quite a long time and I may just end up putting this comment with a link back over on my blog.
Under the Mercy,
Matthew S.
November 15th, 2007 at 11:33 am
You are right, Matthew. We need to give Father Francis the benefit of the doubt here. We all know, as viewers, that he is going to do everything to the best of his ability to do God’s Ordaining Will. I am sure too that there are a lot of other details that we aren’t aware of that have made it come to this kind of drastic measure. It’s none of our business what those details are. He is our Father Francis and our job as his children is to pray and love him into heaven–not judge, and not even dictate what he should and shouldn’t do–that’s not our responsibility, that’s God’s and Father Francis’ spiritual director’s responsibility. Frankly, I am ill equipped to deal with that kind of responsibility. I would venture to say too that we should have prayed for him more than we have been, we may not find ourselves in this situation. We are all so quick to be so hard on our priests, but do we pray for them? Do we fast for them? Do we offer any kind of moral support for them, invite them to our house? Offer them the friendship of our families?? Shame on us! They are human too! They need the support of the laity, especially in this day an age when the priesthood is so assailed! The Devil hates priests and will do anything to bring them down. Forget what Father Francis might be culpable for. We won’t be answering for his sins during the last judgement. We will be answering for ours. I will admit one sin of omission of mine: I haven’t prayed enough for Father Francis–now I am reaping what I have sowed. I don’t know about you guys, but I miss seeing him every week on LOTR and in the homilies at the daily mass. He has done so much good. God will not forget that. I know I won’t either.
November 15th, 2007 at 1:40 pm
Hey, you’re right. I am giving him the benefit of the doubt, that he does intend to honor the vows he’s already taken, rather than recant on them to take new vows. I just have a problem with the idea that he needs to discern his future. To me there’s no discernment. He made that choice before he met the widow. I still see it as the same as if I met a lovely young lady and “got involved” with her…whoops, 6 years ago I made vows to another woman…that means that this new lovely young lady and I have no future together. I don’t have to think about it, it’s a done deal. Why should we think differently about a priest and his vows?
November 16th, 2007 at 12:01 pm
Discerning his future doesn’t necessarily mean that he is discerning being laicized or released from his vows. Discerning his future could simply be trying to decide if he is going to have a public ministry or if he is going to seek something more cloistered.
November 16th, 2007 at 1:50 pm
How sad if it is true that Fr. Francis’s love for another person can be seen as something terrible. Just like there are some marriages that are annuled so to for some in religious life. Of course, all this would be a mute point if celibacy was optional to the priesthood in the Roman rite (as it is in the Byzantine rite). What a tremendous witness it would be to have a married priest in love with his wife and in love with the Church. I see no dichotomy in that. There will come a time when celibacy will be optional as in the early church up to the year 1100. Marriage is a divinely instituted state, celibacy is not.
November 16th, 2007 at 10:10 pm
Woah…did someone at NCR link to my post or something? Errol, the grave error is thinking that a married priesthood will solve such problems. Married men who are protestant ministers have problems with fidelity too…
December 1st, 2007 at 6:44 pm
Errol is, as far too many in the secular world are, confused. Although married men were indeed ordained to the Priesthood in the Latin Rite, once ordained a single Priest could not then marry. Also, married men who were ordained were expected to adopt the discipline of lex continentiae – total continence – meaning no conjugal life with their spouse. You need to study the history of the discipline rather than parrot urban legends Errol. Also, lest you think that adopting the norm of ordaining married men to the Priesthood in the Latin Rite would be the cure to the overall shortage of Priests, take a look at the shortage of Priests in the other 21 Churches, which do ordain married men as a norm, sui juris whoch comprise the Catholic Church as well as the Greek Orthodox Church. Your argument is specious at best, rendered moot by the facts and until you edify yourself you should remain mute on the topic. In the interim, remember Father Francis Mary Stone, MVFA in your prayers along with all the other Franciscan Missionaries of the Eternal Word at EWTN.
December 10th, 2007 at 2:33 pm
I really miss Father Francis Mary Stone. Like Jesus, when Mary Magdalene was being accused, He wrote in the sand, and told the Pharisees, “who can cast the first stone”. They all turned and went away.
We need to be good Catholic Christians, and not judge Father Francis.
Our job is to pray constantly for him. This is what God wants us
to do. We need to walk in this person’s shoes before we could even imagine what he is going through. Father Francis did not have to say anything, but he was honest, and asked for prayers. I would not cast the first stone, as I am sure no one else should. If we do, we are saying that we are god instead of Our Heavenly Father, who is God, because we are judging. I am not god, and I am not a judge. Therefore, I am a person, created by God, to do God’s Will, and leave the judging to Him.
May God bless Father Francis. My friends,and family will offer our masses, communions, rosaries, holy hours, etc. for you Father Francis, and the family you are helping. May the Holy Spirit touch the family with His Divine love and peace.
May God bless you always with peace, love, and joy in your heart.
May the Infant Jesus be with you during this Advent Season.
Peace of Christ,
Philomena
December 10th, 2007 at 10:29 pm
I don’t remember casting any stones. I think I just mentioned the concern that this was allowed to happen and that the wording leaves the door open for him to break his vows to the Church. I hope he doesn’t, and I don’t think he will, but the wording concerns me. Why is it that when a public person “falls from grace” we are suddenly no longer allowed to analyze anything they say?
December 17th, 2007 at 7:59 pm
WHEN A LAYPERSON LEAVES HIS JOB, WE ALL FEEL SAD FOR THEIR CHOICES, BUT THEY CAN ALWAYS BE REPLACED. AND THERE IS NO ONE THAT IS MORE SAD THAN FATHER MARK.IS THAT HIS NAME? HE IS DOING SUCH A GREAT JOB ON LIFE ON THE ROCK. HIS REAL PERSONALITY IS BEING REVEALED. HE CAN CERTAINLY DO THE JOB ON LIFE ON THE ROCK. SAW HIS LAST EVENING WITH IMELDA THE TEACHER WHO TAUGHT SCHOOL IN CHINA..
HE WAS JUST SUPERB. SO PROFESSIONAL AND SO PERSONAL, GOD BLESS HIM.HOPEFULLY FATHER FRANCIS WILL BE BACK TO LIFE ON THE ROCK. HE IS NOT MADE OF IRON AND THE MORE RELIGIOUS ONE IS, THE MORE THE ENEMY TRIES TO GRAB HIM TO MAKE DIFFERENT CHOICES.MY FEELING IS A WOMAN IS A WOMAN AND SHE SHOULD BACK OFF OF PRIESTS, MARRIED,WIDOWED OR SINGLE.I HAVE BEEN PRAYING SO HARD FOR HIS RETURN AND IT IS ALL IN GOD’S WILL. GOD’S WILL BE DONE.
A BLESSED CHRISTMAS TO ALL OF YOU. YOU ARE GREAT GUYS.PEOPLE WONDER WHY AN OLD WOMAN MY AGE AND SINGLE LOVE LIFE ON THE ROCK.IT IS THE GREATEST PROGRAM.
I WOULD HAVE MADE A GREAT MARIST SISTER, BUT I WAS THE LAST IN MY FAMILY, SINGLE, AND WOULD FIND IT DIFFICULT IN THE MISSIONS, WORRYING ABOUT MY DAD AT HOME BY HIMSELF,SINCE MY ONLY SISTER MARRIED WITH KIDS,LIVED 2K MILS AWAY.I TOOK THE PSYCHOLOGICAL TEST AND THEY TOLD ME TO STAY AT HOME WITH MY DAD. WHO GOT MARRIED, HE DID.
AND I AM STILL SINGLE FOR MANY MOONS AND HAPPY,DOING GOD’WILL.
December 17th, 2007 at 10:17 pm
Dee, I appreciate your visiting and posting. Could you please turn off your caps lock when you comment? ALL CAPS when someone posts to a blog is interpreted as shouting.
I must take issue with this statement:
“WHEN A LAYPERSON LEAVES HIS JOB, WE ALL FEEL SAD FOR THEIR CHOICES, BUT THEY CAN ALWAYS BE REPLACED.”
True, but laypeople don’t take vows of poverty and celibacy to their jobs. A vocation and a job are not the same thing. Clergy take vows that are similar to marriage vows…so I think it makes more sense to compare priestly vows to marriage vows than to simply getting a job and changing jobs when you feel like it, etc.
January 1st, 2008 at 8:31 am
Does anyone know Fr. Francis’s name when he entered? It will be easier to see if he is working as a priest (as another did when he left) if you know his birth name.
Thanks
January 5th, 2008 at 7:51 pm
I pray for Fr. Francis and I hope that he will keep his priestly vows. How can we be informed of his decision. And if decides to remain in the preisthood, will he return to EWTN?
January 5th, 2008 at 10:36 pm
I would be surprised if he shows up on EWTN again…there’s credibility damage no matter what decision he makes, and I doubt they would want him as one of the “faces” of EWTN. He could be a guest on EWTN, but I don’t think he’d be on regularly…
February 1st, 2008 at 2:25 pm
Hello, this story was a sad sight to see, but all is not lost. I hope the best and pray for Fr. Francis Mary Stone. I will still love him no matter what decision he makes. I’d like a follow-up on his decision though. It will be frustrating for most viewers of Life on the Rock and EWTN in general, if we never find out his choice.
February 2nd, 2008 at 1:26 am
I hope he raises the child in a Catholic home. I am saddened and pray for EWTN
April 2nd, 2008 at 2:53 pm
please just pray for father francis mary. Everything is possible with the Lord. Pray that the Lord will help Father Francis do what the Lord wants of him. Do not criticize,pray!
May 6th, 2008 at 12:21 am
Like many EWTN viewers, I feel sad about the turn of events for Fr. Francis, and join the others who are praying for him–that he will be able to listen to God, believe and trust in Him, and knowing His will, be ready to obey and follow the direction He has set for him and for everyone concerned, including us all.
May 10th, 2008 at 7:07 pm
There might be things that will prevent him from doing that. I, along with many others, have made mistakes that altered their lives, for better or worse. Sometimes you can make good out of a bad decision. It’s very personal but hopefully he will do what is best for all.
May 11th, 2008 at 3:31 pm
Be strong Fr Stone it will so not be worth it. Take it from someone very intimate with your circumstances.
I just THANK GOD for his grace in preserving me from what would have been the biggest disaster of my life – which at the time seemed like the most wonderful “gift” from God.
It was actually – but in reverse!
My present peace and joy has come from overcoming not giving in to my own temptation.
So be strong, fight the good fight, ask for the grace and set your face like flint for Jerusalem!
PS It can take a while, but you’ll never be tempted beyond your endurance.
May 19th, 2008 at 3:02 pm
I have read through most of the comments on this blog. I agree that it is sad that this priest is going through a crisis and that the Church may lose his priestly ministry. I would just caution some who seem to have such venom in discussing it. Even if he permanently leaves ministry, he may well be reconciled with the Church through voluntary laicization. How will you reckon him then? If his bishop and the Holy See see fit to keep such a priest in the fold through this process, who are we to condemn him?
The analogy regarding marriage is excellent, yet even there, we are faced with the reality of divorce and annulment. Laicization, like annulment, should always be considered regrettable. However, those laicized and those whose marriages are annuled, are not bad people necessarily. There are good reasons for voluntary laicization, and the Church recognizes that. Please be sensitive to this man, and definitely allow him the chance to discern his vocation.
May 28th, 2008 at 2:06 pm
Now that fr frances is out of state does this mean he has left his friend behind i hope for him this would make discerning easier many prayers that he can do what God wants of him and he can be at peace
May 30th, 2008 at 12:35 am
Regarding, Francis Stone this is a real tragedy. The world today is so filled with sex, that many people think it is the only way to prove whether they are a man or a woman. The most important person in the whole universe is Jesus Christ. What a sad day, when a person begins to believe the foolishness of the world, and not the Words of Christ. The world has enough people running after its ways. What we need is those who are willing to lay down their lives for Jesus Christ. Our rewards are not here. Our rewards are there. To the other priests and brothers who are members of MFVA, I say remain true to Christ. You have laid down your life for him. A crown of glory waits for you.
June 3rd, 2008 at 4:54 pm
Wow! I’ve read some very strong comments about Father Francis. I, too, miss seeing him on Life on the Rock, even though I am no longer a Catholic. He’s a very warm and loving man, which comes through loud and clear on LOTR…I have one question for those of you who would exhort him to remain faithful to his vows: Is is possible that his being a priest was a mistake? I say this because Fr. Francis did not become a priest until later in life (late 30’s, I believe)after spending years in the secular business world, and he was engaged years ago to someone else. (While the other priests on EWTN come across as Priests, Fr. Francis always struck me as a Man wearing a priest’s outfit. Just my own observation.) To me, this would indicate that God did not grant him the gift of celibacy. If Father’s true calling had been to the priesthood, he would have been ordained many years earlier. Of course, this is from my admittedly former-Catholic viewpoint. One can be a true servant of the Lord and a loving husband and father as well. I will keep praying for Father Francis to seek what is truly GOD’s will for his life. As I trust you all will, too.
June 3rd, 2008 at 11:06 pm
Elizabeth, interesting comment. I would hope that the MFVA’s discernment and spiritual direction process would weed-out potential vocations which are flawed in this way (if indeed this one is flawed in this way, and I’m not saying it is.) Seems the fact that he was formerly engaged and didn’t go through with it might indicate he knew that marriage wasn’t the right thing, even if at that time he didn’t know what else was.
Also, the reality in our current day and age is that many people putter around all through their 20’s and half of their 30’s before they figure out what it is they want to do for the rest of their lives. I wouldn’t count it a negative at all that he wasn’t ordained until his late 30’s.
June 4th, 2008 at 6:31 pm
I wouldn either, I think many good vocations come later. I think it’s the way he left and why, a nun left EWTN about the same to to “discern at home” and that was fine, but she didn’t have other baggage. She also wasn’t on TV. Fr. F said he was narcissitic, we all fall into the trap of thinking about ourselves before others, we just have to hope and pray that most of the time, it doesn’t hurt anyone else. If he knew he wasn’t cut out to be a priest for instance (I don’t know this of course) being on TV and with youth made it very tough. I think that’s why the MFVA’s don’t attract a lot of potential priests. It’s not your typical order.
June 15th, 2008 at 12:43 am
where is he now? was told by ewtn he had moved out of state prayers still very needed thank you for info i pray hard for father
June 22nd, 2008 at 11:15 pm
I have never felt lead to blog before, however, Fr. Francis Mary and EWTN have been on my heart and in my prayers during this time of confusion. I must also add that for months before hearing about this situation whenever I saw Fr. Francis on Life on the Rock I felt that he was being tested or attacked in some way. I would see him and feel compelled to pray for God’s protection and grace for him to be true to the priesthood. You can imagine how shocked I was when I heard about this. We laypersons must continue to pray for and uphold our blessed priest in prayer. When they are held up in the limelight it opens them up to further temptations. I continue to pray for this blessed priest and hope that he arrives out of his wilderness of tempting as strong as our Lord Jesus was when He defeated the evil one there. AMDG
July 9th, 2008 at 2:09 pm
anything on father? i am still praying for the best for him and his relationship with God.
July 21st, 2008 at 12:36 pm
Fr Francis needs our prayers, just as much as we need the prayers of others to help us in the times that try us. I pray hard for him and truly miss him. I wish that EWTN would tell us his progress w/o too much detail, because as a man & a priest deserves a private life; however, he also is held to a higher standard as the host of LOTR he was a public figure representing the church. I do not cast stones & I wish him the best. Before a man becomes a priest he has taken his vows and declared already that he has had the time to discern whether his calling was true or not. Fr Francis is correct in that this is a sad situation and the communion of saints is perhaps the best hope to help him through this trying time. As I struggle with my own sins daily, I cannot imagine how hard it is to be a priest as so much more is expected & then to be on TV & highly recognized, makes it that much more grave & harder on most individuals. I think all of us pray hard for Fr Francis and hope that he will stay with the Church, with whom he is married. I am sorry that he has these conflicting feelings and fear we may never learn about his final outcome on EWTN, because after this situation is resolved, the Church may never allow him on tv again to protect him and the Church from potential future scandal, which is part of the job of the Church according to canon law.
July 24th, 2008 at 7:24 am
ear Father Mary Francis me and may partner really miss you because of the sermons and homilies we have come to love and listen to, mornining at the Daily Mass. Hopefully, you will return some day; the wisdom we feel is important and is like no other, except for Fr. Angelus. Letting you know we miss you and look forward to your return someday. Thank you
September 8th, 2008 at 1:53 am
Does anyone know WHERE Fr. Francis Mary Stone is now or what he is doing? PLEASE share whatever information you have with the rest of us who care about him. Let me say from my own life experiences that it is so easy to make judgements in error. Thirty-five years ago I made such an error when I married in the Catholic Church. The vows were not as important to my husband as they were to me and there was a divorce. I’ve honored those vows these thirty-five years and never remarried. It has not been easy. But I knew I couldn’t apply for an annulment because I DID MEAN the vows when I made them. And like Father Frank, I was no spring chicken (33 in my case) when I made them. So age is no guarantee that our decisions will be correct for us. I have just considered these lonely years as my Cross and hoped they’ll count as part of my Purgatory. And I also filled them doing Social Work and perhaps Father Frank has also not married and he is doing another work for God. Give him a break…God will certainly give him one if he asks for it.
September 8th, 2008 at 9:41 pm
Kay, thanks for your comment. I talked about this with my wife (the cradle Catholic) and we were both of the understanding that only one of the parties entering into the sacrament of matrimony had to be unable to make the vows in order for the whole thing to be declared null. While I understand that you meant the vows, if your husband didn’t, or if it could be shown that he did not understand their full gravity, then the case would be able to be made that the sacramental bond never existed, thus the decree of nullity would result. Is that your understanding, or am I off base. Again, I understand that your vows meant something to you, but since marriage is a sacrament administered by one spouse to another, wouldn’t that mean that if one of the spouses wasn’t able to administer the sacrament, then the bond never existed to start with?
October 7th, 2008 at 5:41 am
Fr. Francis has his own name back, David Stone and is starting his own business
http://www.davestoneinc.com/about.htminc.
October 7th, 2008 at 8:07 am
I’ve now formulated my response to this development, which you can find here: http://romancatholicbychoice.stblogs.com/2008/10/07/fr-franc is-mary-stone-dave-stone/
October 7th, 2008 at 9:34 pm
[...] all the posts I have written on this blog, the one that has consistently gotten comments over the nearly a year since I wrote it regards Fr. Francis Mary Stone, of EWTN’s Life on the [...]